Tandoids
Wasted
Kilometres Today: 33.8
Total
Distance Cycled: 13,958 km
Some days
you just shouldn’t get out of bed. We all know that. Today was one of them.
What was
meant to be a straight forward 80 km ride to the Redwood “Avenue of the Giants”
began to come unhinged before we even left our campsite. We lost a lot of time
packing up as I oiled the chain (a job I’d meant to do the previous night) and
Judy hung around the women’s “restroom” charging her phone – a necessity as we
had just received a welcome email telling us we are going to be joined by
American friends we made in Ayuttayah, Thailand. We need the phone to make
contact as they close in on us by car.
Finally charged
up and with the bike running smoothly we made a dash to view some of Eureka’s Victorian
style period buildings, a town described as one of the prettiest in Northern
California. Then it was time for business – stocking up on food and buying a U.S. Sim card for the phone. That’s when the wheels fell off.
Victorian style period building in Eureka. Once owned by a lumber merchant, it is now a gentlemen's club. |
We became
lost in Eureka’s confusion of one way systems, speeding traffic and red tape as
we tried to buy that Sim card. Verizon suggested a new phone, and U.S. Cellular
couldn’t seem to lower themselves to provide something so simple.
Archimedes may have climbed out of his bath and shouted, "Eureka, I have it," but we didn't have that tiny little card. Oh, for the days in S.E. Asia, where the nearest 7/11 would fix us up in five minutes.
Archimedes may have climbed out of his bath and shouted, "Eureka, I have it," but we didn't have that tiny little card. Oh, for the days in S.E. Asia, where the nearest 7/11 would fix us up in five minutes.
Minutes Turn to Hours
We cycled around town becoming increasingly
frustrated as the minutes became hours and we could see our 80 km ride
stretching out into the evening.
“We’ve never
had a day like this,” said Judy the Stoker from the back seat. The cycle
computer was clicking up the kilometres but we were going in circles.
Nutters and Dropkicks
To add to
our annoyance was a collection of dropkicks, drongos, and half crazed drug and
alcohol affected nutters who wandered the streets – the tandem was enough to
attract their attention.
“I’ve never seen
so many space cadets in one place,” came the back seat commentary as one lurched, dazed and confused towards us. A half metre high, single rope barrier was too
much for him and the lights changed in time for us to make our escape.
Another
babbled and garbled and waved his fists in the air as we swept by.
PR Role
We gave up
trying to find a supermarket in one direction, turned around and finally found
another. Judy went in and I took up my pose as public relations officer dealing
with tandem security and answering questions from passing shoppers. Fortunately the questions were slow coming
today – I was in no mood for them and maybe it showed - so I was able to turn
my attention to people-watching and was inevitably drawn to the size of them. As
usual, some were grossly overweight.
Vertical or Prone
One
particularly unattractive individual shuffled by, his girth so wide only his
head told you he was vertical and not horizontal. He had ugly tattoos on his
forearms, some gadget threaded through an ear lobe and he hoicked repeatedly onto
the footpath before lighting a fag. He eyed me with suspicion; I eyed him with
disgust until eventually he shuffled off out of my sight.
2.50 pm and we make the decision - we are not leaving town. |
Judy
disappeared again to finally sort the phone. A man picked his way through a
trash can beside me and then went on to the next one.
Cups of bad coffee. |
“It’s not
the most successful of cycling days,” said Judy in a moment of rare understatement.
At last, Judy makes contact. |
Money Please
As consolation, Judy went to buy wine. I went back to my PR role. A man wearing dirty blue jeans and a faded black hoodie with a “Raiders” logo was waving a cardboard sign which read, ”Need Money or Food Please”. Most people ignored him, but eventually a small blue Ford paused for a moment and the driver handed him a note.
It was 3.11
pm. We were going nowhere.
The man made
his second approach to me. “Got some money, a few cents?”
A bottle of "Fat Cat" to help get over the day. Haight Ashbury may be long over, but the label describes the wine and then in a throwback to another era concludes, "Dig That?" |
The mall promised wifi access in "every corner."The small print added,"coming soon." |
33.8 km spent going around in circles. |
I was fed
up, and I thought of the few people we’d seen begging on the streets of S.E.
Asia. Somehow they maintained a kind of dignity about it. Here there were grossly
overfed people, as well as desperate people asking for money or food. It
was doing my head in. How did you make sense of this? My sympathy level was at
a low point but I hesitated. Who was he? Why was he begging? Someone must have
loved him once, maybe even now. I didn’t know his background. Maybe there was
good reason he had his hand outstretched like that. What terrible things had
happened in his past? Was it his fault he was like this? Even if it was, did
that make him any less of a human being.
I shrugged
and turned away and left unsaid the words crashing around in my skull ...“Do I look
as though I’ve got ATM printed on my forehead?”