Naming Baby

We're having a baby. We even have a due date – Tuesday 8 May at the maternity wing of SJS Cycles in Bridgwater, Somerset. It's a long way to go to have a baby delivered, but we hear the facilities are excellent.

We're more fortunate than most parents, in that we get to choose the sex of our offspring – he, she or just plain it. However, it complicates choosing a name – should it be a male name, female or simply something neutral?

The Beast of Burden

Two-wheeled transport comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes

I grew attached to the name of my previous offspring – The Beast of Burden. I've toyed with The Beast of Bridgwater given the origins of this one, but I sense it's not working for Judy. I think she quite likes the maleness of it, that this baby will carry us thousands of kilometres on his broad shoulders, uncomplaining and with a sense of sturdy reliability. But she's uncertain about giving a baby such a long name.

Part of me would prefer a female baby –one that has a caring, nurturing side to her nature and will be there for us through thick and thin. And maybe a name that reflects our kiwi heritage.We've been casting far and wide.

The most famous cyclist/travel writer of them all, Dervla Murphy, had an inspired choice with Rocinante, the name of Don Quixote's horse. Anne Mustoe had Condor and Bettina Selby took the bicycle manufacturer's name to call hers, Evans. Currently, Loretta Henderson is riding around the world on Pandemic – The Magic Bicycle.

  Given that our offspring will be almost as long as a car, we've toyed with the name Stretch, as in Stretch Limousine. It has a certain simplicity and is gender neutral. And what about Coupling? After all, we are a couple, and our offspring will couple and uncouple so we can take it on planes with us. And Coupling also has a Kipling (as in Rudyard) sort of ring to it, which appeals.

We've had a text from an old friend who says her 9 lb 2 oz grandchild – just born – has been nicknamed Chunky Monkey until the parents come up with his real name. It has an endearing quality, but we hope to have settled on a name well before our birth.

Any thoughts anyone? If so, let us know in the comments below.